Today while I was commuting to my work, there was huge traffic pile up. The vehicles were moving at snails pace for a really long stretch. Yet surprisingly I was calm and did not get that usual frustration which spills over the rest of my day.
An interesting thought came up in the midst of the traffic-
Probably this is something you have heard already, yet the importance of remembering it is something which we often tend to forget – Lower your expectations and you will have a happier life. As wikipedia states expectation-
In the case of uncertainty, expectation is what is considered the most likely to happen. An expectation, which is a belief that is centered on the future, may or may not be realistic. A less advantageous result gives rise to the emotion of disappointment. If something happens that is not at all expected, it is a surprise
So what happens if the expectation is lower in the traffic scenario. Well in which case everyday I would lower my expectations as in I don’t expect a congestion free road and will be delayed than usual. Now this is not considering the factor where I am proactive (or at least trying to be proactive) and start early to my work. Regardless of how early I start, I am expecting a traffic. The end result is going to be either being happier or at least being fine. So having minimalistic expectations is one way.
Contradictorily what if I stay positive and think positive – ‘Today I am going to have a hassle free ride to work’. A pygmalion effect.. well sort of ..
The Pygmalion effect is a type of self-fulfilling prophecy where if you think something will happen, you may unconsciously make it happen through your actions or inaction.
The thing about being positive is subconsciously your actions are going to be influenced with that positive thought. Which in the traffic scenario is eventually going to result in figuring out less congested / pocket roads which avoids signals and more meant for bikers like me or end up starting early. Then again, there is a chance of something going wrong in those pocket roads which is not monitored by traffic cops which eventually results in troubled ride to work.
So what is the co-relation or is there a co-relation at all between expectation and being positive?
Being positive means the expectations are already set. However lowering your expectations means you are prepared to accept the negative outcome of something happening and that, holistically speaking has a positive outcome of being content.
Having minimalistic expectations yet being positive seems to be a fair way to put it. Rather than having a positive mind with higher expectations.
Keeping a positive mind is crucial. At the same time disappointments should not come in the way of achieving your end goal.
All of the above does not include one 21st century ingredient – being informed. Of course with the advancement in communication and technology you could get intelligent information to make the right decision. Said that, it also needs to be available when you want it, where you want it. The veracity and velocity of the information is as well key. In my instance, I could have checked the traffic conditions before I had started but what if things got worse only when I am already in beginning of the stretch with no option of going back?
My commute scenario is just one example, thinking aloud it is applicable in other areas of life both personal and professional, but not in all situations.
While it is easier said than done, applying this learning and seeing what impact does it make might take a while. But most importantly how practical can this get…
Have minimalistic expectations and yet be positive
This purely my opinion from my vantage point. Feel free to share your thoughts or opinions.
Dee. 